Once a Cheater…

Once a cheater, always a cheater so the saying goes.  And i believe it.  Now i am sure there are some circumstances when this does not apply but most of the time…i think when someone cheats in one relationship, the likelihood of them cheating again is highly probable.

I watch Project Runway and Devious Maids (this show is soooo good!!) on Lifetime and i came across True Tori, a documentary on Tori Spelling and her husband’s marriage and subsequent infidelity issues.  Although i haven’t seen a full episode, I’ve seen a few scenes where she is condemning him for cheating and getting caught.  It’s very intense scenes, and i suppose they are actors and reality stars so they are used to being in front of the cameras, and a little difficult to watch.

But I also didn’t feel sorry for her in the way i thought i would.  Because as it turns out, her husband may be a cheater now BUT allegedly he was a cheater when he was someone else’s husband.  The girl he cheated on his wife on was her, Tori.

Hence the title of my post, once a cheater, always a cheater.  Why is she surprised that her husband with whom she cheated with on his previous wife would be faithful to her?  I suppose as human beings, we have a false sense of superiority and think we are better than everyone.  Our goods are always better, we like to believe.

I am of course saddened by the fact that Dean McDermott couldn’t make better choices as a husband (then or now) and it’s unfortunate that his choices are impacting his family (especially his five children) in such a negative way.

Overall, its a sad sad situation but i would implore Tori to examine herself because she cries and hollers at her cheating husband.  It may sound harsh but the truth and reality hurts sometimes when we allow ourselves to face it.

Question of the Day: Do you believe that once a cheater always a cheater?


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About Mrs. Pancakes

I became Mrs. Pancakes on 4.23.11! I became Mama Pancakes on 8.28.12! And our lives were forever changed! I call myself Mrs. Pancake because my man loves him some good and fluffy pancakes! The Pancake Life chronicles a life that is happy, inspiring, motivating and lived to the fullest! Why don't you stay a while and enjoy in the The Pancake Life!
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11 Responses to Once a Cheater…

  1. It’s so true. If he would do it to “her” why wouldn’t he do it to “you.” And if that is true it means that people don’t change and that makes me kind of bummed out because I like to think that people are capable of change but at the same time so often I see the opposite. I saw literally 5 minutes of one of those episodes and it was really raw and really sad. I can’t imagine putting it all out there like that on TV.

    • that’s the insane thing she wouldn’t think it could happen to her. i would hope they had received some therapy prior to marriage on this topic but i highly doubt it because they wouldn’t be here!!

  2. Faith says:

    I completely agree with that saying. In my opinion, if cheated on his significant other with you, what makes you think that you’ll be any different. Very sad. But yeah, I wouldn’t be able to watch. Stuff like that always make me so sick to my stomach.

  3. Tonya says:

    YEP, when I first saw their bed and breakfast show or heard about them being together after him cheating, I knew this was coming, just didn’t know when.. She fell for the banana in the tailpipe, HOOK, LINE aaaand SINKER! Smh…

  4. Kita says:

    Yep especially when that man leaves his wife for you don’t think for one moment he won’t leave you for someone else and the pattern will continue. Now I do believe some men cheat and realize their mistake and do better but that is rare.

  5. Never say never. If he cheated to get with you, he’ll cheat to get with someone else. I guess in her mind, she thought he finally had everything he wanted in a spouse, but that’s the thing with cheaters. It’s all about the next thrill for them. Very rarely do they just stop and find contentment with one person, especially if that person is someone they cheated with.

    I do feel for the kids because they are in for a rough childhood if their parents can’t pull it together and make better choices.

  6. jj says:

    This is a sad situation. No one deserves to be cheated on. I don’t believe that once a cheater always a cheater. I am more a “give them the benefit of the doubt” kinda gal. Plus as a Christian, I FIRMLY believe in forgiveness and being transformed. However, I also subscribe to learning your lesson the first time. In other words, I would be EXTRA vigilant for possible signs before something like that happens and make sure we are in constant communication about the state of our relationship.

  7. Pegster says:

    I don’t know how I feel about a saying. I think once a cheater always a cheater with that particular person. If you cheated on your wife, there is a reason behind it and unless that reason is dealt with it will come back. Now you can go on and meet someone else and not need to cheat on them.
    In Tori’s case, I just feel bad for her because I think she genuinely wanted things to work with her and Dean and she probably did not mean no harm when she took him away from his wife. Too bad he went back to his old habits.